The wheels on the house go round and round

Here goes another round of randomocity for y’all, mmmkay? It’s just been that kind of week and I just I’ve got lots to say…or spray.

Ryder…Goode:
This morning I hosted (or hoisted) my, whatcha callit? Ex-wife…BFF…Fly…Tia Kay’s and her hubby-to-be-as-soon-as-she-can-fit-in-an-off-the-rack-dress-again baby shower to welcome in my nephew, Ryder. Kay’s been in my life as a major supporting character for the last 21 years. In an effort to not make CNN Headlines, “World’s oldest living woman gives birth”, she got herself knocked up a half-year or more ago and is figgin’ to pop this thing out of her jay jay in the next three weeks. (Actually, so she doesn’t have to have vaginal reconstruction surgery to snap that shit back in place when it’s over, they’re doing that whole C-Section thing.)

I’ve always wanted to host a baby shower. I don’t know why. It’s one of those “always a brides maid” things, I guess. I had always been invited to them and, more importantly, asked for money to help host one/buy gifts for one, and never dreamed that I’d have one myself. When we got the oldest hellion, our very tight friends hosted us the shower of all showers. We got so much schwag at that shower that some four years later we’re still opening stuff. Jed and I are truly blessed with some amazing friends. Kay was one of the hosts for that shower, so I wanted to return the favor.

I started with a menu of fried chicken strips (and a variety of dippin’ sauces); meaty/cheesy wraps; a pizza fondue with garlic bagel crisps; a foul baby blue party punch thing; and a lovely round chocolate cake surrounded by a sampling of white cupcakes. For games we played “guess what’s in the diaper” (where I melted various mini-chocolates in a diaper and smeared it around); “guess how many diapers are in this generic plastic bin”; and gift bingo (where we numbered all the pressies and then called the numbers out as Tia Kay opened the gifts until someone called “BINGO”). For party gifts I found some AWESOME bottles of wine called, “Son of a Beach”. See, Kay is a beach, and she’s having a boy. Get it??? I feel like the party was a great success. There was lots of friends, lots of fun, lots of laughter…but most importantly, lots of love for this family we’ve created.

Am I dreaming?:
When I got home from the shower, I was exhausted. It’s a lot of work carrying this baby around! I took a nap with my bug for a bit. When I woke up I was a bit dazed. I walked out in the living room and Jed had the television on CMT watching a show called “Trailer Park Disasters”. If you haven’t seen it or heard of it, let me summarize. It’s basically the “Extreme Home Make-Over” for a house with axels and a tongue. The participants are trashy; the homes are trashy; the host is funny (and not nearly as annoying as Ty Pennington). The work they do on these mobile homes, amazing. I honestly am shameful of my “stick built” home after seeing the amazing make-over they did on this 2/2. (Technically, after the make-over it was a 3/2…but!) It gave me hope for my shit-hole (and I’m talking about my house there, folks). I could only HOPE to have the kitchen this trailer had after the make-over. It’s worth the look if you’re looking for a new show.