Monday, December 15, 2008

December Challenge Day 15

The most wonderful gift of the semester:

I think everyone is aware of how much I’ve struggled through US History I this past semester. The course was brutal. The professors teaching methods weren’t my favorite. It seemed the harder I tried the worse I did. I went into the very first test of the semester with no studying time. I took the test relying solely from memory. I got an 82 on that test. It was completely unacceptable to me. The second test I spent a lot of time preparing for. I transcribed the material from the book that I had highlighted in class and I spent days before the test reviewing the materials. I scored a 75 on that test, but she gave the entire class an extra 5 points, bringing that grade up to an 80. WAY more unacceptable to me as I had gotten a 75 on my merits and only gotten an 80 due to her good graces. For the next exam, I not only transcribed the highlighted notes, but I read them into my computer, making an MP3 file and then transferring it over to my iPod. Rather than spending my days listening to my favorite podcasts, I spent an entire week of listening to my hour long recording on an endless loop: morning, noon, and night. I went to bed with my iPod on listening to my lecture. I scored a 70.

Upon learning of my 70 I went to talk to her to ask her what I was missing. I told her it had been 20 years since I’ve been in school, so perhaps my learning skills needed refreshing. I told her that I wasn’t attacking her tests, but her test questions seemed geared towards making people fail. For example:

What is used to make wine?
A) Grape
B) Grapes
C) A bunch of grapes.
D) A whole lotta grapes.

Obviously this is simplifying the tests, but you get my point. I told her that I certainly didn’t expect her to dumb down her tests so that a 4 year old could pass them, but hearing all the other students in the class crying about their test scores, I knew that nobody was doing well. ADDITIONALLY, each test consisted of an essay question worth 50 points, and multiple choice questions worth 50 points. I honestly can say I never got over a 40 on the essay portion of the test and I couldn’t figure out why. I mean, I KNOWS I CAN WRITES. And she would make commentary in the borders of my essays that would say things like, “RIGHT!” and “YOU GO GIRL!”. So I knew I was on target with my essays. She told me I shouldn’t fret too much about my grade. She said, “You still have control over your final grade. You have a movie critique to turn in worth 100 points and your final exam counts twice. AND BESIDES, even though you don’t think you’re doing well, you’re still doing better than ¾ of the class”. Well THAT didn’t make me feel ANY BETTER.

So I wrote this essay on the movie, “Glory”. I far exceeded the 1000 word minimum requirement. I RESEARCHED THE SHIT out of the movie, the characters that were based on real folks, everything. I SPENT HOURS researching this thing. AND I turned it in two weeks early. The week after I turned it in she walked in the class and looked right at me and said, “Your essay was excellent. It was wonderful. It was truly a joy to read”. And I felt great…but didn’t know what I had made on it. When she finally handed it back 3 weeks later I had gotten a 98 on it. A NINETY FUCKING EIGHT. It was then that I knew that no matter how well I did I would not be getting an A in the class. We had just taken our fourth test and while I felt better about it than the previous three I knew I hadn’t done spectacular on it.

When walking out of the class following test 4 we were given all of our previous testing materials (which included the correct answers) as well as the answers for the 4th test we had just taken. ALL of the questions of the final exam would be taken directly from the four previous tests. As it turns out, EVERY QUESTION, all 200 questions, from the previous 4 tests were included on the final exam. I went home and typed out flash cards with the questions and all the multiple choice answers on the fronts and the answers on the back. I studied them. I had Jed quizzed me on them up to and including 3 minutes before I walked out the door to take the test. I knew the answers to every question backward and forward. I had studied them in Spanish (just in case she tried to trick us by giving us the test in Spanish); I studied them in French. I studied them in English. I udistayed emthay in igpay atinlay. I KNEW EVERY ANSWER TO EVERY QUESTION when I walked out the door to take the test.

When I showed up the first thing she did was hand back the last test we had taken. I got a seventy fucking eight on the test (in part because, ONCE AGAIN, despite my BRILLIANT essay, I only got 40 points for the damn thing…otherwise I would have gotten an 88! I was discouraged. Since I’m a mathematical GENIUS, I did my guzzindas in my head and I KNEW, EVEN IF I got a hundred on the final, the BEST I could hope for was an 87. And this was the end of my 4.0 GPA (that stands for grade point average y’all!) I was devastated. I didn’t even want to take the god damn final.



Teacher said that if we wanted to know how we did on the final exam as well as our final grade for the class to email her on Saturday and she would get back with us. And so at 11:59 pm on Friday I sent her an email thanking her for her time, guidance and to let me know how I did when she could.

And I waited.

I refreshed my phone email button every 37 seconds on Saturday because I thought it was defective and not pushing through my new emails.

I refreshed my phone email button every 26 second on Sunday until my battery went dead.

And then it happened this morning, the greatest gift I could have received…do I deserve it? Probably not. Am I gonna question it? ABSOLUTELY NOT. I BUSTED MY ASS FOR THIS FUCKING THING!



Bjorn said...

Congrats on being pretty and smart!

And for referencing Dokken you get +10 Metal Awesomeness points in my book.

Nessa said...

Congratulations my dear! She probably bumped you up because she knew you were trying!

And that fucking Santa scared me again. I'm in the middle of reading how smart and fabulous my Freddy is and HO HO HO goes off! I think I peed. Wait, I know I did.

Breenlantern said...

Boy...for a dumbfuck yer pretty damn smart. I'm going to have to study the dictionary and watch a lot of Sponge Bob just to keep up with you when you visit.

Congratulations, my friend. Bask in the glory. You earned it.

Kevin in Danbury said...